Lipgloss & Lies

Nothing ticks me off more than when a product is all about doing something and then you get it & it does nothing of the sort. It'd be like me buying a car and then realizing there's no way to turn it on.

Well, if I'd have known that - I wouldn't have bought the damn thing.. now would I?

But that's the glory of marketing. Glorious, glorious marketing. I can't hate on it too much since my college degree is in that glorious industry of persuasion and lies, but it doesn't make me any less pissed off when I pay money for something and it's marketing was a complete and total load of b.s. This tends to happen alot in the cosmetics industry. Just ask anyone who has bought drugstore mascara.

Today's featured bullshitter is Venom Flash by DuWop.

I've been intrigued by this brand for awhile. It's not that I'd necessarily heard amazing things about it - but for some reason it always caught my eye. I'd never seen it in a store or anything, so when I put in an order with Apothica recently, I threw it in my cart. It was on sale (sort of) for $13.60 down from $17. It's a plumping lipgloss, which I typically hate.. but THIS ONE promised me "bee stung lips without the pain".. It even stated it was ideal for "those who want full, plump lips with a warm shimmer without irritation."

SIGN ME UP, VENOM. YOU'RE SPEAKIN' MY LANGUAGE.

So the little shit comes in the mail in this cardboard tube, 

I pull it out, and my face immediately goes like this:

The thing is smaller than my pinkie. It's TINY. Maybe my dumbass should've looked at the 0.12 fl oz listing on the description, but call me crazy for thinking I'd get a full sized lipgloss for $13. It's too small. It's almost laughably small. Sample size small.

So I put it on my lips. It's a smooth consistency, gives sort of a "nude/gold/pink" shimmer which is nice. The applicator is a brush which I wasn't expecting. Overall, it's a nice non-sticky gloss that looks pretty on lips. I was digging it at first, I really was.

Then I went downstairs.

OW. OW. OW. OW OW OW OW OW OW OW OW.

No pain? No IRRITATION? None, Venom? Really? You said there'd be none. You didn't say "with slightly less irritation" or "less pain than others". You said NONE. 

I'll tell you what two words I would use to describe the sensation that took place for about 20 minutes on my lips - painful and irritating. It wasn't really tingly - just more of a straightforward OUCH. It smells like cinnamon and it feels kind of like you're running a cheese grater covered in cinnamon over your lips. It's really refreshing. Especially first thing in the morning. 

And there's the clincher. To me, my lips don't look any bigger, they just look shinier. The top one might have juiced up a smidge, but that's only after studying this picture closely. I asked my mom and she said she couldn't see a difference. With the sensation I was experiencing - I was honestly expecting to look in the mirror and see Angelina.

So overall, do I like Venom Flash? It could be worse. But you companies who get off charging $13 for a product the size of a goddamn SAMPLE ... and then on top of that, it doesn't even do what it promises? You kill me. That's irritating. How are you going to say your product doesn't irritate lips when it clearly does? I know it might not be as bad as some plumpers, but why can't they just say that!? Instead of saying "no irritation" say "significantly less".. people would still buy it! But since you chose to pick your words *not exactly wisely* - this happened. And I'll be singing your criticisms all over town.

Me, and my lips, are irritated.

Sephora's "Say Hello" Hello Kitty Palette

I am a Hello Kitty NERD. The ULTIMATE. I have a Hello Kitty build-a-bear, my iPod has a Hello Kitty skin on it, I have a Hello Kitty wallet/planner/glasses case, there is a Hello Kitty decal on my car, etc... While I am usually not a fan of cartoon character overkill - I like to think I do Hello Kitty in the classiest way possible. Nothing I own is tacky and I choose my battles with the sacred cat very carefully.

So when Sephora was like "hey we're gonna make a whole Hello Kitty line" - I just about crapped my pants. I trusted Sephora to do it in the non-cheesiest way possible & judging by the packaging, I'd say they accomplished that. They have some cute blinged out stuff, too - but I'm not paying $50 for a mirror shaped like Hello Kitty covered in rhinestones.

Anyways - I got two things from the collection. One is the "Say Hello" palette which includes 4 eyeshadows and 4 solid lipglosses. The other was a small bottle of the perfume which is apparently just called "Hello Kitty fragrance". I hope the marketing team didn't hurt themselves coming up with that one.

This is the Say Hello palette in SUPER FUN (lol). 

It's available only at Sephora & if you want to buy it online, 

it's available here through their website for $35.

So what did I think? Hmm.. Well. Honestly - I don't think it's worth $35. While I love the packaging to death (99.9% of the reason I chose this product over the others) - the colors are umm.. okay? I'm actually pretty sure I had this EXACT same quad in like 9th grade and it was from CVS. I was hoping that the line would produce some funkier, bolder shades but mmmmmnot so much. The other palette has all lighter shades (mint green, medium brown, lilac, & white) and didn't appeal to me at all - so I figured if I was going to try one, this would be it. I do think the sweet plum color is pretty, but the black & metallic gray are pretty standard and the sugarplum lilac color doesn't have a ton of pigmentation.

And uhhh.. where's the highlight color? I'm not putting lilac on my brow bone. Nice try, though. I know it's not a requirement to have a highlight color somewhere in the palette, but I'm just saying - it'd be nice. Especially since they kind of market this as an "all-in-one" kit.

The lipglosses don't get swatches. Because even though they have color in the picture - they have none on your lips. They all smell like grape & they claim to have like grape seed oil in them so I guess they're moisturizing & shit. Honestly, I'm probably never going to use them lol. Takes a good 3-4 swipes with the ol' finger to get a little bit of shine & since they're underneath the eyeshadows - I forget they exist.

Just being honest.

The perfume is alright. The bottle is shaped like her head, so once again packaging - YOU WIN. I got it with my beauty insider points, so it was free. Not sure if they still have that promo going on, but if you're interested - just ask your local Sephora chick. I got it in-store, not online. The website says it has "notes of green apple and Japanese fruits". They also claim that it will make you smile inside.Can't attest to the second one, but I can tell you that I definitely get a citrus vibe from it. Good not great - I'm more of a fan of light floral scents, honestly. But if you like citrus - maybe give it a shot. 

Overall, Hello Kitty looks better on my car/planner/wallet/glasses case than she does in my makeup collection. It's $35 that you could spend on a better quality palette. Learn from my mistakes, pretty ladies. Don't let the packaging seduce you.

Hot Lips for Chilly Weather

Hola Ladies!

I've had some product reviews building up that I've been needing to do, and when it dawned on me that 4 of the products that needed reviewing were lippies, I figured I'd roll them all into one post. Before I even start, I wanna thank Duchess, Crazy Rumors, and Senna for sending me the following products to check out.

With cold weather upon us and the holidays right around the bend (47 days until Christmas) - there are two things that you need to be worried about when it comes to your luscious lips:

Number one - keeping them protected. Dry, cold air is a bitch & chapped lips are an even bigger bitch. Even if your lips aren't chapped right now, keeping them moisturized all the time will prevent this painful and seriously unfortunate looking epidemic from striking you.

Number two - looking hot. You're going to be going to holiday parties and all that jazz. You need something for Thanksgiving dinner that won't make Grandma think you're a hussy AND you need something that turns the heat up a couple notches when Gram isn't around. I've got you covered on both ends.

"Crazy Rumors" is a fun company that prides itself on using all natural ingredients and fun flavors. They sent me 2 of their lip balms - a Mocha from their "perk" line and an Orange Bergamot from their "brew" line. Coffee and tea lovers, get down, because you're going to love these. They're definitely a bit more scented than most lip balms, but I like them because there are no funky ingredients - which I think is super important if you're going strictly for the benefit of your lips. Plus, they smell way better than those medicated, store brand balms & let's face it: they're fun! They have a ton of varieties and they're all reasonably priced, too ($3.99 per balm). Check out their all natural, cruelty free, vegan brand here.

Here's my Thanksgiving dinner friendly suggestion, which is brought to us by the lovies over at Duchess Cosmetics. I love Duchess lip glosses because they:

1. are not sticky at all, but they're still glossy without feeling oily

2. smell like citrus and vanilla had a delicious love child

and 3. feel and look lightweight,

which is perfect if you don't want to feel/look overdone.

Let's admit that while I may love hot pink lip gloss with gold glitter in it, it's not always practical. This particular color is called "Kate" and if you have a fair skin tone like I do - this is kind of that happy medium plummy color that compliments everything. It's great for fall because it's not too intense, but it definitely gives you a pop of color. They run $18 a tube, so they're more of an investment, but it's a great go-to lipgloss that won't let you down. See all the colors on the Duchess website.

And now my friends, it's time to get Saucy. This lipgloss is freaking hot. The picture does not do the color justice, but it looks to me like your lips are throwing a hot holiday banger and whoever looks at them will want to be invited.

It's that good.

The color is called "LUSH" and Senna describes it as a "gold flecked berry". It's a little bit thicker than most glosses, meaning it is a little stickier - but if you plan on doing a lot of talking, drinking, eating - you need something a little bit more heavy duty. It's a brand new color for fall and even though these pups are $19 a tube, you will get compliments on this gloss - it even looks sexy in the tube. Check it out & the rest of Senna's unreal colors on the Senna website. You've gotta have at least one in your collection.

Well, my ladies - there we have it. I hope those suggestions will come in handy when stocking up for the cold winter months. As always, questions and comments are welcome & I hope all of you have a great week ahead!

Cosmoholic Liquid Lipstick Review

Every chick likes simplicity. I don't care who you are. If you are thinking in your head right now: "Actually, Kell, I am a complex and deep person and I certainly enjoy challenging myself" - you're a lying bitch. I'm going to do you a favor right now and show you just how wonderful simplicity can be.

It's tough to get that perfect glossy lip AND color that you want. Usually, this look requires using a lipgloss and a lipstick and typically when combining two different products, the end result isn't as drop dead sexy as you imagined it to be. You end up with a weird smell or a weird texture or something along those lines. Simplicity. I crave simplicity. I don't want to use two products to achieve ONE look. Wouldn't it be wonderful if some company would create a glossy liquid lipstick that isn't sticky and doesn't smell like artificial bullshit?

The wait is over. Thank you, cosmoholic:

These GORGEOUS liquid lipsticks not only give you the pigmented color of a lipstick, but they also combine the glossiness of a lipgloss... IN ONE PRODUCT! It's a hybrid of wonderfulness! They're available in 7 sexy colors and I had the pleasure of trying out "Prudish Pink" and "Gold Digger" which I swatched for you guys:

 Gold Digger is the only color Cosmoholic has that has 'sparkle' in it - so it makes a great top coat to take your lips from a day look to an "I'm ready to get my par-tay on" look. You can also wear it alone for a sheer, shimmery look. Prudish Pink is a gorgeous medium-pink color and it worked GREAT with my skin tone. It's not sticky at all whatsoever and it smells like natural vanilla. There's nothing artificial feeling or smelling about these products. And guess what? They contain vitamins and antioxidants - SO THEY'RE GOOD FOR YOU! They're like sexy vitamins for your lips.

I really, really super encourage you guys to check out Cosmoholic and pick up one (or 5) of these amazing products. If you need practical lipcolor that simplifies your life and doesn't require you to carry around a gloss and a lipstick - meet your match, baby. I also posted a video review over on our youtube channel, so if you need visual aid .. I gotcha covered.

Thanks for reading, babydolls :o) Don't forget to subscribe to our Youtube channel! xo

Lipgloss Worth Lusting Over

I'm picky when it comes to lipgloss. If I buy a lipgloss and it sucks - the bitch is going in the garbage can. I don't tolerate sticky and I don't tolerate weird smells. So obviously, when I come across a lipgloss that is damn near close to heaven in a tube - you best believe I'm going to share the love.

Now consider this a little sneak peek since this color isn't going to be available until a little bit later this month, but the lipgloss formula itself RULES. Hourglass has sent me stuff in the past, but this is by far my favorite. It's Extreme Sheen lipgloss (this specific color is called "Fortune") and it's available both via the Hourglass website and through Sephora (and Sephora online).. There are quite a few different colors available so browse browse browse!

Fortune is a super pretty pink/gold color and it's surprisingly pigmented for a lipgloss. You can see in the swatch that it gives you that pretty light pink color and the gloss aspect of it is more of a translucent gold. Really pretty and really summery. It smells like cookie dough (shout out to my Aunt Lain for figuring that out for me) and it's soooo smooth - absolutely no stickiness whatsoever. Another great aspect of the gloss itself is how it doesn't feel "heavy" (if you know what I mean). Some glosses feel like they weigh your freakin' lips down - this stuff is light as a feather. It's also water resistant, which I think makes it super unique. It's $28 but (as always) with Hourglass, you get an amazing quality product. You truly cannot go wrong with this stuff.

Let me know if you'll be trying it and if you've ever tried Hourglass in the past. Such a fun brand, and they make seriously kick-ass makeup :) Thanks for reading, dolls!

Hourglass Cosmetics Quick Review

I've really been lucky with getting products to review that seriously are amazing. I'm always worried I'll get something and I'll absolutely hate it and then I won't know what to say. Luckily, that hasn't happened too many times. I love letting you guys know about companies you may have never heard of & it's even better when their products work miracles.

Hourglass Cosmetics is a really innovative company that has a line of amazing luxury-style products. They have really unique packaging and I think their approach to make-up is kind of a .. sophisticated Kat Von D type of deal. They've got everything from self-tanning primer to waterproof bronzer (which is such a good idea). So like I said - innovative! I had the opportunity to try out 2 different hourglass products and I love both of them:

Just when I think I've found a great primer, this comes along. It comes out looking and feeling exactly like a lightweight moisturizer, but I have never experienced anything that makes your skin as matte as this one. And being the matte freak that I am, I was overjoyed. "Veil" is a great name for it since it's really lightweight and feels like you're wearing nothing. When I lay low on the foundation in the summertime, I am totally going to wear just this for a nice matte look. It has an SPF15 & it definitely does it's job with making my makeup last. It's a little pricey at $52 - but it's a fantastic primer and I would definitely reccomend it if you've struggled with finding a primer that actually works for you.

These are seriously SO freaking cool to me. They're lipglosses, but look how super thin they are! I know how ANGRY I get when I have a lipgloss in my pocket and it's bulging out looking all weird and tampon-like. This is ideal to slip into a jeans pocket, that little pocket in your purse that fits NOTHING else and you're confused why it's there, your freaking BRA, your boot.. WHATEVER! It's adorable! You pop the lid off and the front part that shows the color is actually squishy so you just squeeze it out of the tip to apply it. Very unique. The colors are long lasting & not sticky either. I like that since they're so dark, they go on with definite color - but they're on the sheerer side (they are a gloss, afterall). Not an overwhelming look for those with a light skintone like moi. They're called "Prodigy" and they're available for $26 each. They're good conversation pieces :) Pull that sucker out and everyone's gonna be all "OMG"!

Hourglass is such a unique and cool brand and I really hope that you guys check them out. Their full line is available on their website & you can sign up for their newsletter there, as well. Look for them in Sephora or Barney's (if there's one in your area). Lemme know whatcha think. Love you all xo

3-D Movies.. 3-D TV.. 3-D LIPS???

This whole 3-D phenomenon isn't really my cup of tea. I don't dig paying $6 extra to experience increased depth perception & I've yet  to see a 3-D movie that has made my head explode due to it's awesomeness. But alas, the 3-D trend is sweeping the freaking globe & unfortunately, I cannot stop it.

There is one thing, though, that I have recently disocovered that has used the "3-D" title in it's name & I can officially say that I don't hate it. In fact, I love it. I love it a lot. And if you haven't guessed by now - the aforementioned mystery product is indeed a makeup item. To be specific - a lipgloss.

A magical one.

BEHOLD. MILANI 3D GLITZY GLAMOUR GLOSS.

(and no I did not make that name up)

I'm aware that I should probably stop tip-toeing around the fact and just makeout with Milani already, but I can't help it! I seriously love this brand and their ability to manufacture glittery products that don't suck! I picked up one of these little glossy wonders yesterday and of course, I put it on as soon as I got in the car. LOVE IT. The color I got is "starshine" which is a smidge lighter than the pink that is shown above. I get where they're going with the 3-D thing, too.. The glitter in the gloss is different shades, so it does kind of create a "3-D" look. I mean, don't take that and run with it, though... your lips aren't going to appear as if they're floating off your face - but you get my point. Another major plus is that the glitter doesn't feel super gritty, so you're not going to be exfoliating everytime you smoosh them together. All around, I dig this gloss & it looks great over lipstick, too.

And another bonus? Not super sticky. It wouldn't even be here if it was.

 

You can definitely see how sparkly it is in the swatch and kind of get the 3-D thing going on, too. The color is gorgeous, but it is available in other shades. 90% sure I'll eventually own all of them. You can look at all the colors on the website here or look for them next time you're in your local drugstore. I found mine at CVS. It only ran me $6.99, so it's definitely worth it. Packaging is sweet, too!

Mango Tango = Perfect Spring Lipgloss

In celebration of the fact that I'm no longer up to my ass in snow, I wanted to post about what I would safely call my new favorite lipgloss. It doesn't happen often that I get product that I'm so in love with that I have to post about it the day after I receive it - but I'm pretty into this stuff.

In my opinion - you need a perfect spring lipgloss. It's similar to needing shoes when crossing a road full of broken glass and needles. I mean, you could still go on without them, but let's admit that it'd suck really bad.

And this, my friends, is the perfect spring lipgloss:

The one I speak of is the 2nd one from the left,

referred to as the elusive MANGO TANGO.

and also if you haven't picked up on this yet -

it's available through meetmark.com for $6.50

Swatch time:

It's like the perfect peachy nude pink that isn't pink enough to make you look like a hooker and isn't too nude that it blends into your lips & pisses you off because you just paid money for something that's the same color as your lips. Not super sticky either which is always a major concern of mine, as you know. Doesn't smell like much, but that's okay with me since I have yet to love the scent of a lipgloss that isn't a Beauty Rush from VS.

Don't know how long this is still going on for, but the best part about this little gem is that I paid $0 for it because my googling masterful self found a coupon code for free shipping and a free juice gem (when you spend $15 which was not a problem for me). The code is juicegem10, so try that little sucker out & let me know if it still works  for you ;)

Getting inducted into the "still the one" hall of fame?

Don't jump the gun just yet.